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From The Outrageous Funny Story Files...
Newspaper Ads
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old. Hateful little dog. Bites.
FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.
FREE PUPPIES...
Mother, AKC German Shepherd.
Father, Super Dog...able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG.
Looks like a rat ... been out a while.
There better be a reward.
COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 gay bull for sale.
NORDIC TRACK
$300 Hardly used, call Chubby.
GEORGIA PEACHES
California grown - 89 cents lb.
JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer $300.
WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.
WORN ONCE BY MISTAKE.
Call Stephanie.
AND THE BEST ONE:
FOR SALE BY OWNER:
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes.
Excellent condition.
$500 or best offer.
No longer needed, got married last month.
Wife knows everything.
(You could substitute Husband on that last one)
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Howdy! Welcome to Surfer Sam and Friends. We've got blogs, funny jokes, famous quotes, games, travel and sage advice. We've also got free ecards - Surfer Cards - for you to email. So enjoy yourself here. Chill out and relax. Meet the gang. And thanks for helping out, mate. Life's a beach! 
